The modern world offers women many opportunities, but societal expectations continue to shape our view of a “successful” life. Getting married, starting a family, having children - all of this is accompanied by a flurry of approval and admiration from those around us. Is it any wonder that news of career achievements or personal successes often elicit a far lesser response?
Traditional stages of a woman's life, such as marriage and motherhood, have been perceived as the main goals for centuries. These attitudes create a societal stereotype: to be a valued member of society, a woman must fit a certain pattern.
It is important to emphasize: no one is saying that marriage or children are bad. They can indeed bring joy and fulfillment. The problem is that these steps should not be mandatory for every woman. We all have different paths, and they are no less meaningful even if they deviate from conventional standards.
Modern women are actively rethinking established norms. Studies show that the share of unmarried women between the ages of 25 and 54 is growing every year, while the number of marriages, on the contrary, is decreasing. However, this choice is often accompanied by stress: social pressure and inner doubts can cause guilt or anxiety.
When your life goals don't align with conventional expectations, it's easy to feel like an outsider. For example, your professional accomplishments or personal successes may be perceived by loved ones as unimportant. However, it's important to remember that your happiness is not determined by their reactions, but by your own feelings.
- Constantly revisit your priorities. Think about why this particular path feels right to you. In moments of doubt, remind yourself of the value of your choices. This internal dialog helps build confidence and reduce anxiety.
- Find support among like-minded people. This can be friends, coworkers, or communities that share your views. Communicating with those who understand you helps reduce social pressure.
- Take care of your mental health. If you feel stressed or anxious, seek help from a psychologist or therapist. Working through inner feelings makes it easier to cope with challenges and remain emotionally resilient.
How to talk to loved ones about your goals
Those around you may ask uncomfortable questions: “When will you get married?” or ”Why don't you have children yet?” It's important to realize that many do so with the best of intentions, even if their words hurt.
- Emphasize your accomplishments. For example, when asked about family life, you can gently switch the subject, “Right now, I'm focused on career projects. Would you like me to tell you about my successes in that area?”
2 Explain your feelings. If you feel like your successes are being undervalued, a frank conversation can make a big difference. Say, “I feel like my accomplishments in my job go unnoticed. This is important to me, and I would like to share this joy with you.”
- Consider the intentions of the person you are talking to. Often people don't realize how their questions or comments affect others. Instead of being confrontational, try showing an alternative perspective: “I understand that you are concerned about me, but there are other things that are important to me right now. For example, my new position or my travel plans.”
How to get rid of internal stereotypes
Sometimes even we ourselves unconsciously support the same outdated norms we criticize. For example, do you believe that every woman should want a family sooner or later? Or do you automatically assume that marriage is a major milestone in her life?
Try approaching people without assumptions. Instead of asking questions about marriage and children, ask, “What are your plans now? What inspires you?” It's also important to find reasons to celebrate outside of traditional scripts: buying a house, a successful project, traveling - these deserve attention and joy, too.
If we want women to feel valued regardless of their life path, it's worth reconsidering many established traditions. For example, why are invitations to events often limited to a “plus one” in the form of a romantic partner? Let's include friends, coworkers, and family members who play an important role in our lives in the circle of significant others.
Every woman has the right to choose her own path, whether it be family life, career or a passion for traveling. The key is to remember that the value of life is not determined by meeting other people's expectations. Take care of your mental health, support other women and create a society where everyone's choices are respected and accepted.